But to protect your partner, it's a conversation you need to have. If you have an active STD, it's normal to be nervous about telling someone new. Everyone raises the subject differently. Imagine that your roles are reversed. What would you expect your partner to do and say if he or she were in your shoes? Be proud of your intentions. Your willingness to have this hard conversation shows that you care about the other person and your relationship. We're more likely to trust and respect people who are honest and brave! It's best to be direct. You don't have to share every detail of your past relationships, but showing that you're open to talking and answering questions can help your partner feel more comfortable.
It's best to be honest. It's better for your partner to find out because you said something before getting an infection. Let the conversation proceed naturally. Listen rather than doing all the talking. Prepare for your partner to be surprised. Each person reacts differently to the news.
Some might get panic. Some might be full of questions.
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Others might just need to time to think. Don't push your partner to make decisions about sex or your relationship right away. It's normal to want acceptance and reassurance after revealing such personal information. But give the other person some space. Make a suggestion like, "I know you probably want some time to think about this.
Encourage your partner to ask questions. As you talk, give your partner facts about the STD. If you can't answer all of your partner's questions, that's OK.
Say you don't know and then go to a health clinic or search online together to learn more. If you and your partner decide not to have sexual intercourse vaginal, anal, or oral sex , there are other ways you can be intimate or express your feelings for one another. If you do decide to have intercourse, use condoms and practice safe sex.
Ahh, so refreshing to hear, Chris. Nicely said, Chris. Thanks so much for sharing. I totally agree. Thanks for this. This is the way I live my life. When others ask me questions, I share what I can. The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself. I loved this, thank you. When I see this in other people and perhaps myself once!
I wonder if the desire to share comes from an aspect of ego — a bit of pride, superiority, that kind of a thing? So easy to fall into the trap! I kayak. I kayak a LOT!!!
This happened to me on Saturday of this week. Well, my best friend and I were talking about religion and I was having a panic attack that day due to a new job situation. I called her, asked her to calm me down, and she did. She saved my life. Of course, then when I calmed down, she tried to tell me the reason why I was having a panic attack. I had another more severe panic attack the next day, and I went crazy. What a great, simple insight. But I have felt that not everyone is so receptive of them, even the simplest ones.
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Thanks for reminding me to lead by example and action, not by words. You can be unreasonably happy.
People will notice we had changed. When we are happy we shine and empower those around us. When I have that moment of clarity or grasped a hard-earned lesson, I want to share it in order to save others the painful trial and error of getting there. The student has to be ready. I never understood this lack of generosity nor their lack of desire to spare others the pain. For those of us eager to learn, please continue to share in your wisdom. Brilliant, and frighteningly timely. As in, nearly to the minute — whoa.
Cyndi: hear, hear! Kayaking is bliss. This post make me think of a evangelist guy we met named William during our trip to Uluru in Australia.
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He was a nice guy but on every occasion during the trip he was talking about how Jesus saved his life and how we should repent from our sins and such. The bus was full of young tourist backpackers, some barely speaking English and many from different country and different religion. Some way, I was happy for him that he found himself but he was so annoying!
Was she threatened by his happiness? Was it annoying to her and she wanted it to stop? Or was it simply a free-spirited and well-meaning comment? Thanks for the post! I feel so connected to everyone. Happiness is infectious. You know, I completely agree with this article, but I have found over the past year, as I have changed my lifestyle to suit me, I have often had to offer up an explanation to people for why I am not as available as I used to be. Any thoughts on this? Well… I agree. Thnx for reminding. When or in which way is it nice and non-ego? That would be the best way! For example… When I read real stories about Nike, from Nike, and the lessons are inspiring… I am welcome to here them… So therfor my thought of this post: where to share and where to stop?
Really loved reading this today! If I sing when I garden the right people will notice. Reading your post today made me realize how this is. Thank you for your writings, Chris. Nice thought. Feeling happy is indeed a personal experience. No doubt. If you go that way, do consider visiting it. But there may be some who will profit. If a word of wisdom comes to me without any cost, I lap it up without second thought.
And I am sure there are many others like me. Your blog is one such source. Happiness is always an internal happening. Happiness arises in response to your thoughts or you simple presence to what is.
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You cannot recruit people to make you happy or teach others how to find happiness. Joy naturally exists in each moment if you are receptive to it. Yes life can be difficult but those difficulties never have to get in the way of your joy and happiness. My experience so far is that people seem to struggle to keep everyone at whatever level of happiness they are at.